The bar charts were very readable and great in showing the major difference in the comparison of food vendors to merchandise. I am assuming that the comparison is sales or maybe count by locations. The page felt a bit crowded and in need of more visual space between the pie charts and bar graphs. The text in between the two different graphs makes reading the page a bit confusing because you don’t know where to stop reading across the page. I think just adding the word or a symbol in between the two pie charts being compared would also be helpful because all six pie charts to the left can feel like all six pie charts are being compared with each other.
Agree with Nickoia about Page 2 feeling crowded. Some suggestions below.
I loved looking at the “icon ideation” slide. Seeing the variety of icons you went through before choosing the final icon was really beneficial. It helped me to understand why there is an umbrella on the skyline–to imitate street vendor umbrellas. However, I don’t know if the icon itself communicates on its own. The graphs are super clean. The only thing I’m unsure of is if the comparison of midtown vs. NYC is helpful in explaining something new or if the midtown bar graph on its own would be clear enough.
I agree with Virginia’s comments.
I love everything the title page, the font, color, and icons. Are the icons self-drawn with indesign? That’s pretty amazing how you used black and white “windows” to portray depth of field, cool! The pie charts are nice too, and the font size and placement of categorized percentage presents the information clearly to the audience. For the bar graph, I would make the suggestion of using the same scale of 0 to 3000 other than having one chart with the scale of 0 to 80. Using the same scale in both charts would make it easier for me to compare the charts.
Thanks for the feedback. I will take it into consideration. The icon was done mainly using the square tools and pen tool in Illustrator.
The suggestion about the y-axis scale is a valuable one to consider. I’m not sure what I would do, either–part of Issa’s intent here is to demonstrate a parallel, so similarity works in that favor, but the numbers are vastly different, so it’s a question of what is the more honest way to represent this information.
Sharp title slide! I was drawn in by the skyline graphic, typography, and page composition. I love the bold color and text choices.
Agree with Nickoia that the second slide is a little crowded. I think this issue could be remedied by streamlining repetitive information. In the bar chart, for instance, the words “food cart” and “general merchandise” each appear twice, in the chart titles and in the legend. I think labeling the bars with the words would be easier to understand, either on top of the bars themselves in a contrasting color, or above/below (no need for a chart title or legend).
The asterisked caption tells us something about proportionality. But I easily missed the difference in y-axis scale, and couldn’t get a sense of the absolute comparison. Why not display the two data sets at the same scale in two different sized pie charts?
I was confused by your choice to break out the 100% of street vendors into 6 separate donut charts. I think the breakdowns would be more easily digested if they were in a single donut/pie chart. (or use your talents with icons to represent each category that way, like some of the infographics we’ve looked at in class).
Really fun to look at your sketches, too!
Excellent comments and suggestions, Abigail.
I agree with Abigail about the break down of the pie charts. The choice of a pie chart is to show relationships between mutually exclusive categories and I think a pie chart is indeed the correct choice, but should probably be agglomerated. If you wanted to show distinct differences in measurements, perhaps you could keep the break down, but display them in numerical order, showing more clearly the range and distribution of categories.
I also agree that the icon ideation slide is great! The potential icons in there could be very useful in showing the differences between vendor types, but it seems you don’t use the icons for data representation throughout the presentation, rather just as an illustration on the title page. You might even be able to replace the text on the pie graphs with icons of each type of vendor? I think that this might be the power of a good icon — the ability to represent a concept without having to say too much, and perhaps even better than with text. Your ideas in your sketches are clearly in the right direction for creating icons that do just that.
Oh almost forgot, I really like the choice of font on the title slide. Just sayin.
I love the design of the title slide. I find the umbrella placed on top of the buildings particularly clever; I appreciate the indirect reference to the physical elements of a street vendor’s cart and the “urban-ness” of the informal industry.
The first thing I notice about the second slide is that there is too much going on. There is not enough space between the two sets of graphs. I don’t think the label “general merchandise” should abut into the bar charts’ space. Otherwise, I like think the data the graphs are meant to show is conveyed clearly. I do not know however if the series of donut maps was necessary (rather than one donut map that utilizes different colors), although I recognize that this is personal preference/opinion.
Finally, and I’m not sure about this, I don’t like that the two bar graphs use such different units. However I understand that this is necessary because they compare hugely different scales. I do think the sentence “The two graphs are almost proportionally identical” was emphasized more because that to me is the most important idea conveyed by this set of bar graphs.
Some very good and pretty consistent feedback here. My notes:
+ Street Vendor Impact on NYC is not a premise–it’s a category of assessment. Can you think of a title that might do more to communicate a premise? Right now it’s not clear whether your assessment of impact will be positive or negative.
+ The umbrella is a key piece of iconography for some street vendors, but of course, not for all, and I think the application of it to the skyline is clever, but not clear enough, as others have noted here. The cart with the umbrella, central top in your sketches, is an image that would instantly tell me ‘street vendor.’
+ Try to use your headlines for more than category descriptions. Stake a claim. What is a takeaway you’d like your audience to grasp with each slide? Make that the headline. Presenting an array of information without a proposal of what to do with it is putting a lot of work on your audience.
+ By using the same graphic language for the ‘Small Carts’ and ‘Large Carts’ graph comparison as for the rest of the graphs on the page, you suggest that each of these categories is a mutually exclusive subset of a total. But, of course, small vs. large carts are a separate distinction from the type of vendor. It would be better to differentiate these two sets of graphs more so that they don’t read as one continuous data set. Differentiation might be by scale, color, style, even placement on different slides if necessary.
+ Where does this data come from? Make sure to cite a source.
+ Slide 2 seems to actually be presenting multiple narrative points, each of which need a separate slide. The comparison of proportions between food and merchandise carts in midtown and the city as a whole is its own topic. These graphs seem shoehorned into Slide 2 right now, with their labels and key not very clearly tethered to them–these could easily be misread as being relevant to the donut charts.
+ Not sure you need all four of these lower donut charts to be separate. They are all part of a single whole, right?
+ The bar graphs on Slide 2 are at two very different scales, and it can be borderline misleading to make the two of them look so similar. I wonder if you might try a proportion chart of some kind instead of a bar graph?
+ No need for a key in the first place–just label your bars. It’s only two bars–no need to make your audience work harder by scanning back and forth, when you can just label.
My only note on style here is that color palette and typographic palette are great here. Some fun, interesting and non-distracting styles being deployed.
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